First off to start this, I received my Interview for my Mental Health Counciling Masters Program, and now I am praying super hard I get in. The next step after that is making sure I can get the Graduate assistantship as well. I’m very excited.
In other exciting news, its adventure season for me again. The weather is warming up (on its strange fluctuations) and I am ready to break out of hibernation. William and I are going to go to The Great Philly Comic Con this April and on top of that exciting news, I will be cosplaying this year (as I said in my previous postings)! Usually I’m lazy about these things but I am actually doing it! I made a financial plan and everything. Crossing my fingers it works out is the next task haha. I will be doing my Ken Kaneki gender bend cosplay and I couldn’t be more excited. I just need to get it all together. Photo’s and video’s to come I promise!
Now obviously cosplay is very much focus on the body, but not negatively. Prior to weighing myself I was wound up about gaining weight in my downtime recently. I am now realizing I haven’t gained any weight since my inactivity with my surgery, I’ve actually lost weight. Which, due to body dysmorphia, I can admit during that time I was at one of my peaks with my weight obsession. I am doing better now and making sure to positively reaffirm myself has been a great supporter in the healing of my self-esteem. If anyone struggles with that that is reading this or has loved ones that have dysmorphia in their lives, just remember you need to be patient.
Be kind to your body and if it’s your loved one be kind and help them see the positivity even if it’s overwhelming or annoying. They are just as annoyed with themselves, believe you me. Do not feed the obsession but rather make positive body comments not related to weight. For example, “Do I look okay?”, “Am I larger?”, “I think I look like shit.” etc. don’t respond to yourself (or that loved one) with validations to those negative questions, it will just continue the cycle. Rather say something like “You’re healthy and deserve to feel happy in your own skin.” This allows yourself (or the person) to understand that you (they) are worthy and nothing about you (them) is negative or wrong.
Supporting ones self is huge and learning to allow those negative thoughts to come and go is a hard thing to do, but it will come in time so don’t fret and grant yourself (or your loved one) patience. We are all on this hard journey together, that is why I really want to get into cosplay to celebrate who I am and what I look like no matter what. If I want to be a character, nothing will stop me and cosplayers are the largest bunch of accepting humans ever, so it’s the perfect place for me to start! Finding that comfortable first step is difficult but it comes easier each motion you make.
Leave in the comments below your first step or your worries, or story. Its okay because being there for one another is a wonderful thing.
Until next time!